The purpose of sensate focus is to help couples overcome established, goal-oriented sexual routines that aren't healthy for them, increase sexual closeness and communication, and decrease anxiety over sexual performance.
Sensate concentration is based on the premise that couples may let go of expectations and fully immerse themselves in the sensual touch without judgment. Mindful touching, satiate concentration, or non-orgasm/non-arousal focused touch are other names for the same phenomenon.
However, if either partner feels aroused at any time during this process, it's best that they not develop it into a sexual encounter. Otherwise, they risk reverting to old sexual habits. Instead, the pair may let their guard down and feel one other's fingers and body without any expectations, judgments, or preconceived preconceptions.
At this stage, the toucher may pay attention to their partner's surface features, including their warmth, texture, and shape. The toucher may shift their focus from one area of their partner's body to another, modify the rhythm or pressure of their touch, or use their whole hand or fingers to feel different textures and temperatures.
Unless anything is bothersome, the recipient should remain silent and let their partner know how they should be touching them. Otherwise, the receiver should pay close attention to the sensations felt by their partner's fingers and hands and make mental notes on them.
Although there is no hard and fast rule on how long this stage should last, it is recommended that couples exchange roles before becoming bored or exhausted. It was recommended by Masters and Johnson that fifteen minutes of touching each partner could be sufficient time to thoroughly explore these feelings without becoming tired.
After a few days of repeating step one, couples may decide when they are ready to go on to step two.
Also Read: 11 Foods That Act Like A Natural Viagra.
If either partner becomes excited while doing it, that's OK, but they shouldn't make it into a sexual encounter.
Pairs may also use a method known as "hand-riding" in the second stage; this involves the receiver placing their hand on top of the toucher's and providing subtle, nonverbal signals, such as gradually increasing pressure, to the toucher.
The receiver may need to sit between the toucher's knees at this stage to make room for the technique. Again, when the allotted time has passed, the partners will exchange places.
Cold oil or lotion should not be used by the pair. This is achieved by warming the lotion in the palm of the toucher before applying it to the recipient. Another option would be for the pair to heat the lotion or oil completely in a tub of hot water before proceeding to step three.
In this stage, partners may also touch each other with their tongues and lips, but they shouldn't kiss or engage in oral sex. In this manner, individuals can explore new sensuality and sensory enjoyment without falling back on old sexual habits.
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For further information and advice on sensate concentration and other sex therapy approaches, see a qualified sex therapist. Find a certified sex therapist near you by using this directory if you and your partner are considering sex therapy.
Sensate Focus Technique
The method, which was created in the 1960s by Dr. William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson, is a sequence of touching exercises that a couple does. The couples are encouraged to practice nonverbal communication by focusing on the physical sensations of touch, such as warmth, texture, and pressure, rather than their expectations or assessments of one another's touching.
Sensate concentration is based on the premise that couples may let go of expectations and fully immerse themselves in the sensual touch without judgment. Mindful touching, satiate concentration, or non-orgasm/non-arousal focused touch are other names for the same phenomenon.
Need
When couples seek help for issues like impotence, orgasm, premature ejaculation, or body image, a sensate focus may be suggested by sex therapists. A physical exam may help rule out other possible reasons for sexual dysfunction before beginning treatment, but it's vital to remember that these issues might also have a medical basis.Also Read: Home Exercises For Long Intercourse
First, the couple decides who will be the one to initiate physical contact and who will be the one to accept it. Halfway through this process, they'll exchange places so that everyone gets a turn touching and being touched.
The recipient will lie down in a relaxed posture while the toucher places their hands on any part of the body except the genitalia or breasts. For the first stage, Masters and Johnson put the genital areas "off limits" to emphasize the significance of sensuality in touch rather than contact for arousal or sexual pleasure.
Steps Of Sensate Focus
Various versions of sensate concentration exist, but the five-step approach initially established by Masters and Johnson remains the same.Step 1: Non-Genital Touching
When engaging in sensate concentration exercises, it is ideal for both partners to be undressed, clean, and well-rested. Wear loose, comfortable attire if they can't be nude.First, the couple decides who will be the one to initiate physical contact and who will be the one to accept it. Halfway through this process, they'll exchange places so that everyone gets a turn touching and being touched.
The recipient will lie down in a relaxed posture while the toucher places their hands on any part of the body except the genitalia or breasts. For the first stage, Masters and Johnson put the genital areas "off limits" to emphasize the significance of sensuality in touch rather than contact for arousal or sexual pleasure.
However, if either partner feels aroused at any time during this process, it's best that they not develop it into a sexual encounter. Otherwise, they risk reverting to old sexual habits. Instead, the pair may let their guard down and feel one other's fingers and body without any expectations, judgments, or preconceived preconceptions.
At this stage, the toucher may pay attention to their partner's surface features, including their warmth, texture, and shape. The toucher may shift their focus from one area of their partner's body to another, modify the rhythm or pressure of their touch, or use their whole hand or fingers to feel different textures and temperatures.
Unless anything is bothersome, the recipient should remain silent and let their partner know how they should be touching them. Otherwise, the receiver should pay close attention to the sensations felt by their partner's fingers and hands and make mental notes on them.
Although there is no hard and fast rule on how long this stage should last, it is recommended that couples exchange roles before becoming bored or exhausted. It was recommended by Masters and Johnson that fifteen minutes of touching each partner could be sufficient time to thoroughly explore these feelings without becoming tired.
After a few days of repeating step one, couples may decide when they are ready to go on to step two.
Also Read: 11 Foods That Act Like A Natural Viagra.
Step 2: Genital (and Breast) Touching
Partners take turns being the toucher and receiver in the second phase, which is structurally identical to the first. However, in this phase, the toucher may also touch the genital areas of their partner. Still, exploration, not sexual gratification, is the objective, thus the toucher shouldn't focus more or less on the genitalia than anywhere else.If either partner becomes excited while doing it, that's OK, but they shouldn't make it into a sexual encounter.
Pairs may also use a method known as "hand-riding" in the second stage; this involves the receiver placing their hand on top of the toucher's and providing subtle, nonverbal signals, such as gradually increasing pressure, to the toucher.
The receiver may need to sit between the toucher's knees at this stage to make room for the technique. Again, when the allotted time has passed, the partners will exchange places.
Step 3: Adding Lotion/Lubricant
Using a lubricant for any genital contact and lotion or baby oil for body touching makes step three identical to step two. Changing the medium of touch was, according to Masters and Johnson, "one of the ways of enhancing sensory awareness."Cold oil or lotion should not be used by the pair. This is achieved by warming the lotion in the palm of the toucher before applying it to the recipient. Another option would be for the pair to heat the lotion or oil completely in a tub of hot water before proceeding to step three.
Step 4: Mutual Touching
The fourth phase involves simultaneous physical contact between the couples. Partners should not touch to cause sexual arousal, but rather with the attitude of just experiencing the sensations and emotions of touch, in keeping with the fundamental concepts of the preceding three phases.In this stage, partners may also touch each other with their tongues and lips, but they shouldn't kiss or engage in oral sex. In this manner, individuals can explore new sensuality and sensory enjoyment without falling back on old sexual habits.
Also Read: 15 Home Remedies To Treat Anemia
Step 5: Sensual Intercourse
"Sensual intercourse" was a deliberate choice by Masters and Johnson for the last stage of sensate attention. The partners have been working on a heightened sensitivity to touch as part of this method. This is why they are opposed to going back to a sexual experience that is primarily focused on producing an orgasmic response.Alternatively, individuals may return to the practice of mindfulness during sensual touch by paying attention to the sensations of heat, shape, and texture as they re-engage in the act. Before resorting to automatic thrusting movements, they may gently enter and withdraw fingers or the penis from the vagina many times.
They could try different breathing patterns to perceive the effects on the feelings. Whatever the pair decides to do next, it would be wise for them to keep their heightened awareness of touch and bodily sensations consistent with how they trained themselves.
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Conclusion
Although it may not spark desire right once, sensitive attention has advantages that build closeness over time. Couples build a deeper bond based on nonjudgmental exploration when they let go of performance constraints and refine their sensitivity to touch.
As couples discover how to explore their own and one another's bodies with interest, anxiety dissolves and communication and trust are fostered. The real benefit comes from rediscovering the power of vulnerability in a loving embrace, as well as the thrill of touch and presence, even if orgasms can be the ultimate result.
One delicate touch at a time, sensual concentration is a thoughtful journey that opens the door to a deeper, more meaningful sexual environment rather than a fast cure.
Resources:
- Boskey, E. Medically reviewed by Carly Snyder, MD. (2020, June 4). Sex Therapy With Sensate Focus. Verywell mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/sex-therapy-with-sensate-focus-4145783
- Cornell Health. (2019, Oct. 18). Sensate Focus. https://health.cornell.edu/sites/health/files/pdf-library/sensate-focus.pdf?source=post_page
- Miles, J.R. Medically reviewed by Lynn Byars, MD, MPH, FACP. (2021, Feb. 22). Sex Therapy With Sensate Focus: How It Works & What to Expe
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